This poor guy shouldnt trade in a mother that needs too much from him for a girlfriend that does the same. I think his mom is relying on him a lot. He is 22 years old and fully capable of downsizing his mother's place in his life to make room for you and other adult pursuits. Meanwhile, she merely had to state what she needed and her husband would have When Relationship Partners Act Like Parents when he spent time with you in person, was he attentive and thoughtful? She should probably move on and find someone who has moved away from home. These are loaded words that might make your boyfriend more likely to close off. It seems he is trying. It's a pity, but yikes to that whole home situation. Pop over to justnomil and read some of the information about the page. If hes not willing to see how unhealthy this is, you should cut your losses and walk away, because women who do things like this to their sons never, ever want to let go. It took distancing herself, and accepting the fact that she wasnt supposed to be my mom before she fully got to setting boundaries to my mom who wasnt taking care of me and was expecting her to. my Mom The reason seems to be quarantine/social distancing. Overall your boyfriend sounds like a good guy who was raised by a good mother who likely does the best she can with four mouths to house and feed. His mom isn't the problem. It might help you understand why he's put up with her behavior, and give you both some tools at dealing with the situation. His mother uses guilt, silent treatment, and passive-aggressiveness as a weapon. In your heart you have to do what is best for you. Is she going to the extreme? Before you get honest with him, you need to be honest with yourself. To my knowledge, he hasnt had a girlfriend since (5 years later). No reason to think he will be that way when he moves out and becomes independent. Imagine a 22 year old living at home, supported by his mother, refusing to help out with errands/chores. It sounds like a family working together to get through a pandemic and a terrible time.